Zombies

Living in new york is great. I am within walking distance of 3 different fastfood places, all of which are open 24/7, prostitution is abundant (though i would never, it is comforting to know that it exists. you know, just in case...), my school is just a short bus trip away, my darling hoch is even closer, yes siree bobble, life is good and i know it. These are all amazing things and make my time here in nyc a super duper fun time. But i knew living here was not without its risks.
Crack still pollutes the streets, bloods and crips and other gangs fight quietly in dark alleys (places pd still refuses to patrol) over who gets what street corner, my prostitutes are most likely dirty in the hooch, and of course the very distinct possibility of a zombie outbreak.
During my time in NJ i had a very well thought out zombie outbreak protection plan.
My town was small, my house secure. It would be no problem to walk the quarter mile to the local gun shop, raid it and return home and wait off the zombie horde with beer and loaded m16s. After my family dies horribly tragic deaths (although i am well stocked, i go out daily to scavenge for supplies and look for any survivors that i trust. one day, my father forgets to lock the door and unknowingly allows a zombie into our fortress. He is bit and i am forced to shoot him in the face. I laugh. My sister I am assuming is dead. she goes to a big state school and as for my mom she turned the first day of infection.) I make the executive decision to travel the land in an endless search for the cure and true love. Along the way, i meet my team and we all become zombie and survival experts. I save a few of my friends from various locations across the U.S and eventually head for Canada where we fortify an abandoned military base and establish society once again. I lose sight of my original goal and become disillusioned. rightfully so I become a ruthless dictator and frequently execute any insubordinates. Eventually I am ousted through an upheaval but manage to escape by making the base vulnerable to zombies, who of course come pouring in by the hundreds. The base suffers explosions from our gas source and violently burns to the ground. I walk through the Canadian wilderness, badly wounded when I notice my thigh has been bit. i am feverish and nauseous and my hand starts to shake. i slowly reach for my holstered gun, pull it out and place the barrel to my temple. I end myself before the zombie infection takes over my body. a wolf eats my body.

my plan is well thought out and most of it quite possible. I know what youre thinking and youre right; everything past my family dying is just speculation anyway although it would be super cool to be eaten by a wolf. Now, i have to think of something feesible in one of the worlds largest cities. How do you escape 5 million, flesh hungry, brain thirsty zombies in such a compact area? If you think im going to tell you then you are fucking out of your mind. Once word gets out, everyone is goign to start doing it and buying the right equipment and then maybe everyone will sell out and ill be screwed out of surviving. So fuck you all. I was born to survive the zombie outbreak and you are all destined to die. The only survivors will be the ones i choose so if youre smart, get on my good side and i might be paying you a visit sooner than you think.
REMEMBER, its never too early to start preparing for the undead horde...
enjoy life as we know it while you can